Studies indicate that young children can absorb knowledge at a faster rate than any other age. Their developing minds become engaged in new words and concepts until languages and processes are understood and executed with ease.
Mature mentalities can still achieve, however, with exposure to life’s limitless experiences. Children are confined to the boundaries and standards of living set by guardians and other authoritative figures. Historic events are discovered in textbooks. Relationship principles are compiled from watching mom and dad interact.
Children cannot fully step out of the environment painted around their tiny frames until they have engaged all five senses in personal experiences. Until then, they learn their parent’s religions and moral guidelines. They learn to make friends and share and use manners under supervision. They learn that love is the sole reason for existence through Disney tutorials.
Girl desires true love.
Boy fulfills the dreams and wishes of Girl.
Girl shows appreciation and admiration for Boy.
Reciprocal kind gestures lead to Happy Endings.
I will admit that I watched too many Disney movies growing up. By fourteen I thought that I had learned enough and that I was ready to be elated for the rest of eternity; I yearned to settle down with my Knight and Shining Armor in a house complete with an ocean view and white picket fence. Yes, we actually designed blueprints together, and it was innocent and special at the time, I will not lie. But then the word “forever” vanished off of notebook scribbles. And I had to find a new Prince Charming.
Twenty-two and still single, I have stumbled upon new insight while searching for my soul mate. I’ve captured the hearts of surfers, intellectuals, bad- boys, and Peter Pans by putting my best foot forward. Sometimes my feet would be bare and my hair would be tousled from the beach, other times my nails would be pink and my shoulders would be exposed for a sexy night on the town. I catered to the desires of the men I craved because I wanted the “fairy tale” idea so badly- I played into their lifestyles. Honestly, however, I never thought about my own needs. I never contemplated what made me happy. I had only experienced their environments. Then, after the relationships went sour, I’d write in my notebook:
Ideal:
Phone Calls At The End Of The Day
Creative, Spontaneous Gestures
Tattoos Are A Weakness** Not Necessary Though
Unacceptable:
Unfaithfulness
Bad Body Odor** I Know. It Happens.
I Can’t Surf. Let’s Face It. I Went Once. And Snowboarding?
I’d assess the relationships and learn about what was important to me and what wasn’t. It didn’t occur to me though, that after a notebook of standards and guilty pleasures, I still hadn’t uncovered things I did to make me… me. I was still focusing on the male aspect of the equation. I wasn’t mature at all, I still didn’t know myself.
I needed to experience life on my own. Even though children grasp concrete visual and mental puzzles easily, young adulthood is the perfect time to break out of those painted walls of culture and expectations and social boundaries set by others. I realized that by settling down now I might be missing out on the chance to broaden my horizons, like travel to Greece or give a young boy money in Haiti or fall in love for a weekend in Paris. Exposure to such instances do not swirl around open doorways forever; I must ride those winds while the opportunity exists. When I meet a man in the future I will be able to tell him that I snowboard, and I do it as a hobby and not as an excuse to get to know suitors. I will be able to tell him that I have a degree and that I work in a successful company, rose to the top all by myself with my intellect and creative drive. I will be able to tell stories of my younger years as memories of sheer freedom and not as snippets of past relationships.
I feel like I am getting there… I am painting canvases in front of me of charming people and exotic places, rather than hammering in picket fences or putting up new sheetrock. I am living life to the fullest at my own pace, and when I am done with my journey I am confident I will make someone happy with my own gifts. My paintings will be valued by someone else who has artwork to share as well.
For now…
… I’m doing me, Disney.